#164 In which our hero takes his lovely wife out on the town Pt. 1

This weekend was, as previously stated, our fifth wedding anniversary (that’s the wood anniversary, in case you were wondering) and we wanted to celebrate in style for once. See, we really haven’t had a proper vacation since our honeymoon.

We made arrangements for The Scientist’s parents to come up and watch the girls so we could be footloose and fancy-free. No alarm clocks! No deadlines! No commitments!

For months we’ve been planning a trip to Columbus. Now, Columbus isn’t the most exotic place in the world, but it is where we first met. Well, that’s not really true; The Scientist and I were first introduced on a chilly morning outside at a park in Toledo… but that’s not really the resort area we had in mind. Besides, we really started dating when I lived in Columbus, and I proposed in a coffee shop down there, so there’s no shortage of sentimental reasons to head south.

We left work a little early on Friday and started driving. We had rented a room in a big hotel downtown and planned a quick change before heading off to our anniversary dinner.

Now, I don’t expect anyone to kiss my ass, and I’m not the kind of person who especially enjoys getting my ass kissed… but honestly, a little bit of it once and again is kinda nice.

As soon as we pulled up to the hotel it started. The valet guys were right there; “Can I get you bag sir?” “Here’s your ticket ma’am, enjoy your stay. Oh, let me get that door for you!” It continued at the desk; “Please enjoy your stay, if there’s anything we can do for you, just call the front desk!” Nice.

We were on the 21st floor, and the elevator required us to swipe our room keycard before it would let us up past the 17th floor. “Just how fancy of a room did we get?” The Scientist wondered aloud.

As it turns out, not too fancy.

It was nice and all: king size bed, shower massage, free movie channels (but no porn, sadly). But nothing that special really. But since we weren’t planning on spending a ton of time in the room, it didn’t matter.*

* Now, if that fucking gout of mine hadn’t resolved itself, we may just have spent the entire weekend in that room. We did a lot of walking, and thankfully I was able to move mostly pain-free by Friday.

We changed into some steppin’-out clothes and headed out to the restaurant.

The Hyde Park Grill is our anniversary restaurant of choice. We usually go to the one in downtown Cleveland, and it’s nice. Not super-nice, but still enjoyable. We had gone to one in Columbus before, and it was the same deal. This time, we were trying yet another location, this one situated in the Short North area of Columbus, which is this little artsy part of town full of fancy shops and galleries.

Hyde Park is one of those places that was the height of coolness about 20 years ago. Now they just seem a little dated. I kinda dig the old-school feel, but it’s clear that you’re not dining on the cutting edge.

But! The Hyde Park in the Short North is very different from what we’ve seen so far! This place was very plush, very cool. And, since we made reservations and indicated that it was our anniversary, the ass-kissing started anew. “Right this way, sir, and happy anniversary!” “We’re so glad you chose to spend your anniversary with us!”

Our waiter gave us just the right amount of ass-kissery… not so much that he was grossly fawning over us, but still enough to make us feel special. And the food… Kick. Ass.

I started with the pan-seared scallops, and The Scientist had the lobster bisque. For an entrée I had the peppercorn-encrusted strip, which was cooked to a perfect medium-rare. The missus had a petit fillet topped with lobster meat. We shared a huge portion of garlic mashed potatoes. Good lord, but was it fantastic food. The Scientist ordered a nice bottle of meritage, which even I enjoyed (I have the wine palette of a 6-year-old). A delightful chocolate mousse torte for her and a wonderful crème brule for me and we were done.

We spent roughly the same amount of money on that meal as our normal food budget for two weeks at home, but it was worth it. We waddled out of there completely satiated and satisfied.

NEXT: Street performers, segways and… Bob Ross?